The EXPRESS LANE
..10 Items or less please sign was papered over with Thanksgiving Special data, there was one woman in line and her items were already bagged. I swept in behind her for a pay/dash (while fellow shoppers further lengthened the other check-outs) and realized she was trying to describe to the Express Lane cashier the type of cigarettes she wanted. The Express Lane is the only lane featuring tobacco products, which are otc only. If a shopper’s first choice in smokes is not available or easily located among several hundred types, much discussion and finger pointing and option sorting needs to ensue. Typically enqueued with two tiny packages, swelling with deja vu, I glimpsed the beginnings of the ritual.
…What would happen next, once agreement was reached on brand, length, diameter, flavor and filtration options was certain: Lottery tickets. Available only otc in the Express Lane, with nearly 100 games to choose from. Ms. CorkinBottle actually retreated to a place in line behind me to make her many and varied selections, chanting her number prayer:
…“1 of 56, 2 of 23, 1 of 8”, etc.
…With the cashier attempting to satisfy her:
…“One, Two? 43? 23? Two? No?” etc.
…I had nothing to do but ponder what the “M” in Big M Supermarket stood for.
…Big Money? Mess? Mammary?